How to have satisfactory sex?

Six rules of sex intercourse: 

1) PREPARATION.

A period of love play involving caressing and kissing should precede the sex act. During this prelude there should be no impediment to full skin contact, and the man should seek by gentle caresses to concentrate his wife's sensations in her vagina (avoiding the clitoris completely)

and to render the vagina thoroughly moist. The reason the vagina must be moist is not just to facilitate entrance of the penis, but also because water is a good conductor of electricity. Their two different potentials of bio-electricity cannot equalize each other through a dry vagina, the chief cause of frigidity.

Avoiding an irritation of the clitoris, however pleasant it may be, is important, because, since it is the center of attention during the immature, pre-vaginal stage of development, this immaturity will continue into married life so long as the woman's interest is not successfully transferred to the vagina.

This warning against irritation of the clitoris is repeated in an effort to counteract the advice of some writers on sex who, yielding to the desires of their immature patients, still recommend as love play and stimulation a masturbation of the cliotoris. By this mistake they deprive their patients of a complete and ideal sex satisfaction. This bad practice alone is enough to keep some women frigid.

A woman can have either one of two kinds of orgasm - a clitoral orgasm or a vaginal orgasm. The clitoral orgasm is all that is known by most immature women, even during vaginal intercourse. They can only be half satisfied by it. However, if a woman will abandon that half satisfaction, she can eventually learn the deep, mature satisfaction coming from the orgasm brought about by stimulation of the vagina and tip of the uterus. Granted, such women will go through a sexual dead period, while losing the accustomed sensation, and before gaining the right one, but a few weeks of concentration, patience and will power will bring an abundant reward.

The prelude to sex union itself requires a prelude, a day of mutual kindness and tenderness. A man cannot expect his wife to react amiably to his love making if he has quarreled violently with her at the dinner table; her resentment toward him would tend to block the delivery of bio-electricity from her cells, and the emotional disturbances in her would absorb

so much of her energy that the sex act, even though successful, would leave her exhausted.

Coitus with a dry vagina is a purely mechanical act lacking animation. This sort of coitus is therefore a masturbatory act that results in depression and disgust. This is expressed in the Roman proverb: Laete venire Venus; triste abire solet (Venus arrives happy, but goes away sad). This is true in a sex act between a prostitute and her customer. Such a relation, trivial, exhausting and ugly, leaves a bitter aftertaste of frustration.

But uninhibited sex partners who are attuned to each other, and well prepared for the sex act, feel animated, refreshed and happy after their union. Their love grows and deepens.

(2) POSITION.

After the preliminary love-play, the partners should occupy the following position which permits perfect freedom of movement as well as complete absence of muscular effort, and avoids stimulation of the clitoris.

The wife first lies on her back with her knees raised so that they touch her breasts. The husband lies on his right side to the left of her, turned toward her in such a way that his left leg lies above his right leg. In this position he puts both of his legs under both her thighs while his wife lets her legs fall over his left hip. In so doing he has to move his body away from her body. She is still on her back lengthwise of the bed, while he is still lying on his right side but crosswise of the bed. Most couples prefer that the man place his left leg between the woman's legs. It takes time to understand this position. Therefore let me recapitulate:

To achieve the position in question the two partners go through the following movements.

(a) Both lie straight in bed on their backs; the husband on the left side of his wife.
(b) The wife raises her knees so that they touch her breasts.
(c) The husband now turns toward his wife, lying on his right side; this means that his left leg is uppermost.

(d) Next he moves the upper part of his body away from his wife, until he lies at right angles to her, his thighs under her lifted legs, his penis in close contact with the entrance to her vagina.
(e) While his right thigh remains under the buttocks of his wife, he puts his left leg between her legs, so forcing her lifted right leg downward toward his right leg.

This complicated description can be now simplified as follows:

The husband, lying at the left of his wife, turns to her and puts his left leg between her two legs, so that their sex organs are in closest contact.

In so doing he automatically executes all the movements described above.

If this contact is accomplished, the two may place their legs however they find best, as long as the sex contact remains undisturbed. Both husband and wife can thus lie relaxed in every muscle, yet can move in their accustomed way with complete freedom and effortlessness. So close is the contact that even after intercourse they can sleep in this position without losing the contact of the sex organs.

Only by lying in as perfectly relaxed a position as the one described can the husband hope to hold back his orgasm long enough to permit satisfaction for his wife.

The author disagrees entirely with the opinion of a well known sex expert who recommends a position, in which "man and woman meet face to face or converse position," as the natural one for human beings.

In the position which the author considers normal, the male and female sex organs can be brought into still closer contact if the man will open the outer and inner lips of the vulva with his fingers and place the penis between them, at the entrance to the vagina.

At this moment all kisses and caresses on other parts of the

body should cease, in order that the awakening bio-electrical streams may flow undisturbed toward the sex organs.

In this position it does not matter whether the penis is in erection or not; the important thing is that its tip should touch the mucosa of the inner lips at the vagina's entrance.

After half an hour, when the full exchange of the radiations of the two individuals is established, the penis usually becomes erected and can enter the vagina. If neurotic causes of impotence have first been eliminated, erection will occur even in cases which have a previous history of impotence.

(3) DURATION.

Until the man has learned to hold back his ejaculation the position outlined above should usually be maintained for at least half an hour,outside the vagina. (The period of preparation may be shortened if the partners have previously been animated.) Complete sex union, in which the tip of the penis penetrates the vagina so deeply that it touches the entrance to the uterus, as it should do in perfect intercourse, then follows. ("That is closing the switch and brings a current of indescribable ecstasy."-N. J. Herby.) This sex union without ejaculation lasts normally for half an hour, though this time can advantageously be lengthened to an hour or even, as in the case of "Karezza," to two to three hours, if the couple remain motionless.

Many men complain that their sensations on penetrating the vagina are so strong that they are not able to control the discharge of the sperm cells.1 This so-called ejaculatio-praecox is, in most cases, not a disease, as many laymen and even some physicians believe; it should be regarded as a weakness characteristic of immaturity. Just as a small child has to exercise

the sphincter muscles to control the urine, so can the adult exercise his muscles until they are able to resist the urgent desire for orgasm. Most of the men I have known who "suffered" from ejaculatio-praecox, were spoiled, sensual persons who had never learned to control their emotions.

Sex and character march hand in hand. If we strengthen a weak man's character, we will also have helped him to over come his ejaculatio-praecox. Only by contraction of the muscles through which the sperm flows out can ejaculation be retarded. This is accomplished a step at a time. First the man learns to retain his semen for two minutes, then for five, then ten, and so on, until he reaches his goal of half an hour or an hour.

A great help in these exercises is to remain motionless in the vagina. Friction during the sex act produces electricity. Should it happen that, in conducting this exercise of motionless sex union, a man loses his erection, it is due to the fact that the bio-electrical currents which should be streaming to his sex organs have been blocked or diverted. This should not cause discouragement, as the erection will either come back later or be regained in full strength during subsequent exercises when this form of self-control has become so automatic that it no longer requires thought.

Even if the man has his orgasm before completing a half hour of intercourse, he must not withdraw, but remain motionless, after the orgasm, at least half an hour, regardless of his lost erection.2

Obeying this one rule alone relaxes a couple to such a degree that even the tension and dissatisfaction which so often follows too short a sex act disappears almost entirely and changes disgust to contentment.

(4) CONCENTRATION.

From the very beginning, the sex act in all its phases, preparatory love play, position outside the vagina ("outdoors") and full sex union, should be performed with full concentration on every detail. Nothing must distract the attention of the two partners from what they are doing. They should train themselves to be completely aware of the sensations in their sex organs and also of the "flow of electricity" they receive from their partner. If the power of concentration is thus exercised, the perception of sensation develops to a degree that gives the utmost delight.

If, on the other hand, the two people allow their attention to be diverted from the sex performance by the noise of the radio, children, or the telephone bell, or if they converse, or even permit their thoughts to wander to other subjects, their "radiations" are directed to the brain cells and, to continue our mental picture of this hypothetical occurrence, the "flow" to the sex organs is interrupted. In such an event the orgasm is weak and unsatisfactory.

(5) RELAXATION.

Every muscle of the body-every cell, even-should be entirely relaxed. Any kind of tension serves to block radiation. The more relaxed the cells are, the more easily can they discharge "radiations" which need to "flow," undisturbed, to the sex organs. The art of relaxation can be learned by daily exercise in the manner described in the book, Release from Nervous Tension, by David Fink, M. D. But, in addition to physical relaxation, mental and emotional relaxation are also important. Such factors as feelings of guilt connected with the sex act, resentment toward the love partner, and preoccupation with worries, interfere with a neces

sary state of full relaxation. Relaxation is of the utmost importance, not only to the act, but also to the individual's health and happiness. An inharmonious home life, ill-trained children, friction of any kind, can disturb the sex union of parents.

Overwork can bring on exhaustion which is sometimes confused with relaxation. But an exhausted organism can only become animated after an amount of stimulation so great as to irritate the nerve substance. Therefore the best time for intercourse between working people is the morning, especially a Sunday morning after breakfast. If there is a possibility of the children disturbing their parents' sex union, it is best to start it after a few hours' sleep on Saturday night, or early the following evening after a restful Sunday.

Sometimes a husband has to overcome, by tenderness and love, an exhausting neurotic blockade in his wife against the delivery of such "radiation" from the cells of her body. In some cases the wife fears an awakening sex desire, because these feelings once brought her into deep, emotional conflict with parents, society, or her conscience.

Alcohol induces only a temporary relaxation; coffee and drugs a temporary stimulation. Bodily contact, without sex union, during the whole night, is relaxing, as it permits the different bio-electrical potential, from the two bodies, to flow towards each other and release tension. Cases in which both partners have declared that they preferred twin beds because they disturbed each other, but later were persuaded to occupy a double bed, showed obvious improvement in their relations after a few nights. They became more harmonious, more indulgent toward each other's weaknesses and, occasionally, a seemingly dying love revived between them.

 FREQUENCY.

As a rule, a well performed sex act, one in which full sex union lasts for half an hour, cannot, and should not, be repeated more than once in five days. When sex union

lasts for an hour, repetition in a week's time is indicated; when it lasts for two hours the interval should be two weeks.3

The reason why it is not advisable to repeat a successful sex act within a short time is that "the batteries" of the body need to be "recharged." A healthy sex act relaxes both partners so completely that normally they do not even desire a repetition.

The man who boasts about his sexual capacity and claims that he repeats the sex act practically every day exposes himself as no master in the art of love. His statement, if true, proves that not one of his sex performances could have been satisfactory. He has a local relaxation in the testicles; his "detumescence impulse" is satisfied; but by his sex act he has, presumably, merely delivered "radiation" out of his cells but has given it no time to unite with that of his wife. This unconsumed "radiation" remains in his body, tensing him and leading him to the delusion that his superior virility requires another ejaculation of sperm cells.

Too frequent intercourse forces cells in the testicles to concentrate more on the production of sperm cells than of hormones. An organism without hormones has no animation or energy. In the end it leads to exhaustion, frustration and a disgust with the sex act which includes resentment against the person who has aroused his desire. This is a typical picture of the end of many a passionate love affair.

These are the six rules essential to a satisfactory sex union. The question of outstanding importance to so many couples,

how to conceive children under the best circumstances, will be discussed in the chapter on birth control.

• 1.Dr. Arnold Kegal of Los Angeles has discovered a set of small, delicate, muscle fibres which lie around the bladder tube, the vagina and the lower part of the intestines; muscles which can be strengthened through exercise. The fact that it is possible for a man to learn to control his ejaculation indicates that voluntary muscles also exist in the ducts of the penis.
• 2.With this recommendation the author is in disagreement with sex experts. Dr. H. Dickinson for instance believes that to "stay in vagina afterward so long is not to be recommended - only as long as wife desires."
  For this divergent opinion the author offers the following: Most women are accustomed to an unsatisfactory, short intercourse, which leaves them tensed. In order to avoid such torture, they fight as much as possible against the delivery of bio-electricity from their cells; therefore they block their currents to the sex organs and so remain frigid. The fight is so exhausting that they want to get their hated sex union over as quickly as possible. But if they had once experienced the right, relaxing intercourse, they would give up their fight from the beginning.
• 3.This recommendation appears to be contradicted by the statistics of Kinsey, for he says that on an average a married couple has intercourse more often than every five days; nevertheless, in the author's opinion very few of these couples enjoy an ideal sex life, therefore the desire for more sex unions.
  Even though a man has exceptional sexual potency and uses a shorter interval of intercourse than five days, it would be wiser for him to resist his impulse: for love and desire for his wife. would only increase in him.
  The same principle applies to eating: for if a person has a favorite dish and partakes of it too often his desire for it decreases.

• Secular Traditions